HEY what Venti in like the hands of that giant Barbatos statue outside the Barbara getting both

HEY what if… Venti sleeps… in like the hands of that giant Barbatos statue outside the church…

• Barbara getting both angry and confused: I don’t know how you got up there but get down RIGHT NOW you unbelieving fucker!!!
  Venti: FIRST OF ALL I absolutely don’t believe in Barbatos, fuck that guy–
• Diluc’s like do…. do you need a bed… a place to rest… because I own a tavern and uh… I feel somewhat worried about you… and Venti’s like nah it’s cool I just like sleeping in the hands of a giant twenty foot stone statue of myself
• Jean’s like “does it count as blasphemy if you are the god” and Venti’s like “absolutely just let me smite myself on the spot”
• Traveler: Is it nice up there?
  Venti: Yeah!!!
  [That night] Venti, storming into Diluc’s tavern: The Traveler stole my sleeping spot!!!
• The Knights of Favonius start betting on who can get Venti out of there
• It becomes like a running joke to tempt Venti with something ridiculous to get him out of there
• “Hey, bard! If you stop sleeping in Barbatos’ hands, I’ll give you a kiss on the cheek!”
  Venti, bouncing over: One kiss per night out of the hands
• Diluc: I’ll give you a drink if–
  Venti, immediately: Let’s make it two
  Diluc: You didn’t even let me finish.
  Venti: I’ll do anything for drinks
• Venti at some point pulls Barbara up into Barbatos’ hands and she’s like wait… this is…. actually kinda nice… and Venti’s like isn’t it? :))) And Barbara’s like “it’s still blasphemy though”
• Diluc: So are you homeless or–
  Venti: All Mondstadt is my home
  Kaeya: That’s a yes
• Venti has, in fact, fallen out of the hands, multiple times. Every time he catches himself, he says “it’s a miracle that I survived!” and every time Jean heaves a great sigh. Even if she’s not the one he’s talking to. Her Exasperation Senses are tingling